We all need to supplement our income somehow.

While teenagers often say ridiculous things, teachers can be equally ridiculous with the lies they tell students. The best part is how students sometimes fail to question what we say, because since we're teachers we obviously always tell the truth.

From a coworker's conversation with one of his seniors:

Student (upon seeing a burn on his arm from his oven): So, what happened to your arm?
Teacher: Oh, my damn meth lab got weird again.
Student: Huh...
Teacher: So, back to what [the character] is thinking here...

It used to be a sin to kill a mockingbird, but now you get 10 points for everyone you hit with your Escalade!

One of my coworkers is teaching To Kill a Mockingbird to her freshmen right now. While I could never teach freshmen, as they are annoying and smelly, the one good thing about freshmen is there is never a lack of ridiculous things they say...

Kid: Yo Mrs.--, why is Scout so gangster? She’s just straight up gangster.

Winning is my main goal in all areas of my life, class included.

Sometimes being a teacher means acting like a 12 year old...

Girl: So that's the answer, right?
Me: Yep, exactly.
Girl (pauses a moment): Did you perm your hair?
Me: Um, no, my hair is curly. It's always been curly.
Girl: Weird, I don't think I've ever noticed that.
Me: You've been in my class for 9 weeks now.
Girl: Yeah, I know.
Boy (pipes in): I think it's dumb.
Me: What is?
Boy: Your hair. I think curly hair is dumb.
Me (deadpan): Well, I think your face is dumb.
Boy: I, um, oh...
Me (hands raised like a touchdown score): I win!
Boy looks confused and goes back to his reading.

The word is getting around...I'm fancy!

Last week I wore dress pants, a cream colored sweater set and these cute wedge heels I bought a while ago. I don't think it is anything any different from what I usually wear to school. Yet this conversation occurred today in my classroom:

Girl Student: Wow, you're all dressed up today!
Me: What? Really?
Girl Student: Um, yeah. Why are you dressed up?
Me: But, I'm not dressed up...
Boy Student: You're wearing a necklace, you're fancy.

So apparently I'm fancy, who knew?