I don't think I've ever posted these links, but if I have, too bad because you should read them again. Several years ago one of my co-workers discovered funnyexam.com, which collects amusing essays, test answers, and other generally ridiculous things teenagers submit in class. How much of it is real, I don't know, but these two items are forever my favorites from the site. I often tell people that my mom is "90 stories tall, and her adventures are legendary". If you knew my mom, you'd understand how that is actually true. Anyway, these are funny. Give them a read.
Biography: Walt Whitman